You can’t be what you can’t see!

Last night I’ve posted a story asking for people to react to an specific message, and to the ones who did that, I would tell them what I like the most about them, what I admire the most and what I’ve learned from them so far since we have met. 

There are so many types of people who answered to that, and so many others did not do it. Some of the ones that have answered might have done just for fun. To see what I’d say about them. To know how I feel and what I see when I look at them. Out of curiosity! Some of them maybe just did it for vanity. To get attention, to make reposts. Maybe some of them just did it because they know how much I love expressing my affection for those in my life. Some of them just did it because they are the kind of people that react to everything. Ha ha! 

Some of the ones who didn’t react, didn’t do it because they either skip my stories or because they can’t take any more stories at the moment about “react to this”, or any of the Instagram “challenges“ now that everyone is home in quarantine. Ha ha! 

Maybe some of them are are just really tired of Instagram these days. And some of them didn’t do it because they’re just insta passive users. They see everyone and everything, but never post anything or show themselves. 

These ones don’t really care about participating on anything on insta. They don’t want to look like us: hallucinating people who are part of a bubble of unnecessary oversharing life on a daily basis.

But at the end, if you’re reading this blog for example (and that’s a long post let’s agree! But you’re still reading it) it means you’ve seen the link on my biography. 

And that’s why you’re here: Somehow you’re curious about my life! Or about my thoughts. So, people overshare because there’s people like you.  Passive insta users generates an audience for the ones who shares daily life. Now tell me: are you really out of the bubble you criticize so much just because you don’t post or participate on anything? Or actually you’re already living in the bubble?

Getting back to the subject of this text: 

Some of them, didn’t reacted to my stories (even curious to know what I’d say about them), because they’re not comfortable with the idea of receiving  affection, or being honored or admired in public, or even privately. They think people around them haven’t learned anything from them. They feel like they don’t make a difference. And I’ve noticed all that by observing some things on social media during the last 24 hours and also after the messages I’ve got after that story I’ve post. 

It was such a simple story that I’ve posted out of the blue while bored last night. But since the moment when I started getting the reactions I’ve got; it made me, and it’s still making me to think so much about people. 

I had couple people reacting and coming to me afterwards saying “I’m not sure if you’ll have something to say about me but I’ve reacted anyways”. Someone else these days came to me asking if he’s on my “close friends list” by accident or if I really meant it for him to be part of it. He was surprised when I said that of course he’s on my close circle list! 

Some of the people haven’t reacted to that story because they don’t feel like I’d have anything to say about them.

There, we have again a mirroring effect. It’s not me, it’s you! Is not that these people don’t think I can’t have an opinion on them yet. They are the ones who doesn’t have an opinion on me. And because they don’t, they assume the same about me not being able to have an opinion about them. When they think I would have nothing to say about them, that’s because they can’t have an opinion about themselves yet. And if they can’t, how could I? By hearing what I most like about you, and what I most admire about you, and what I’ve learned with you since we met. You realize that you don’t see yourself yet, while others people do. We feel like a fraud, because we can’t relate to what people see in us, Because you can’t be what you can’t see. It’s simple! And if you don’t see yourself, you can’t understand what people (me in this case), see in you. And you’re left with a lot to process. And it hurts. And we avoid pain. So we pretend. 

So, for some people, not reacting to my stories, or to anything else on Instagram these days where everyone is showing themselves as stripped as possible, it’s just a way of self protection. There’s nothing more painful than to do not understand yourself. I know what I’m saying, I’ve been there before. And it almost destroyed me. 

In the other hand, to react to everything that goes “react to this and I’ll post what I most like about you”, “react to this and I will repost my favorite picture of you” is also a desperate ask for help. It is how someone can be desperately asking for approval. In order to find your self value. Because you don’t know it yet. Or you can’t see it. By doing that, we want to learn who we are by what people see in us. And not by who we are. That’s when labels comes in. And even the good labels can wrongly define you. If you let it. 

Or maybe nothing I just wrote made any sense. In this case you and I just wasted both of our times on this reading. But we’re home anyways. And there’s nothing else to do, otherwise you wouldn’t be finishing to read my nonsense. 

So, as sad as it is because I could write about this subject forever; I’ve go to go now and wash my hands. See you in the next post. Cause I’m sure you’ll keep coming. Not because of me of course! I’d be silly if I though any part of you giving attention to what I post has to do with me. Nah, babe! Haven’t you notice that you’re not interested in me? You’re only interested in yourself.  I’m only a mirror, and you just want to see yourself. That’s why you keep coming here. 

Did I scare you? Boo! 👻